My Life in Ink

Flag Flying on the Pearl Harbor Memorial

There’s nothing like your name scrawled in ink to make a defining moment in your life.

So, the contract is signed.  My life takes on a new chapter.

Everyone has been asking what this means, and what is going to happen next.  I am officially a part of the U.S. Navy Reserves.  I will be going in as an IT3, meaning I will be working with intel communications as I did during my prior enlistment.  There are other cryptologist jobs that I’m interested in, but due to the large amount of individuals going back into the military right now, these positions won’t be open for a few months.

I was formerly a Petty Officer Second Class, however, I was never paid for that rank before I was discharged.  This basically means that I’m now being demoted.  Luckily, I can retest for advancement in August.  I’m already studying and am confident that I can reacquire my rank and get back in the game.

I will be requesting Full-Time Support (FTS) status to work within the Navy as if I was a regular active duty sailor.  As such, I will receive the same benefits and active duty time applied toward retirement.  Once I’m processed in as full-time, I will likely be assigned to a ship out of San Diego.  However, I am seriously considering volunteering to deploy to the Horn of Africa (HOA) or Afghanistan for a year.

So I’m just taking this one step at a time.  I’m going to let everything fall where it may.  I just have to keep an open mind.

Holding on for Dear Life

Sometimes we need to do things in life without a harness.  Ropes that tie us down and keep us safe, can also keep us from experiencing the feelings that make life memorable. 

Today I spent a couple hours with my cousin hiking and bouldering up this massive rock formation in the desert.  It was an intense undertaking on its own, but what made it really stand out as a challenge to me, was that it was the first time that I had climbed boulders without any protection.

I was put in a position where I couldn’t give up…because my life was at stake.  I found strength where I thought there was none.  This isn’t necessarily strength drawn from the fear of pain, but more from the determination that I knew I could do it.  The fact that it was my only option was just additional motivation.

This experience meant a lot to me, in that it was another example of how I can’t live in fear.  The bruises, tears and cuts are proof that I overcame a challenge that couldn’t keep me down.

It’s the same with life, I suppose.

Flashback: Hurricane Katrina Relief

Flooding Three Weeks after Hurricane Katrina

One of the greatest experiences of my life was the opportunity to be a part of the Hurricane Katrina relief effort in 2005.

The Category 5 storm struck the coast in late August and it was quickly decided that the USS Iwo Jima would be heading up the military efforts.  We all went home, packed our gear and reported in first thing in the morning.  We had no idea what was in store…and no idea when we were coming back.

We headed to pick up 2,000 marines from the 24th MEU and thousands of pounds of food and supplies.  The Iwo was originally assigned to go to the Biloxi, Mississippi and start up the efforts down there.  Biloxi was devastated.  Although not affected by the floods, the entire city was in shambles.  I volunteered to be in the first unit to deploy ashore.  For the first time in my life, I was a part of something that was really making a difference.  Something that was actually changing lives.  But our presence in Mississippi didn’t last long, they needed us to redirect to New Orleans immediately.

The scene in New Orleans was critical.  Our ship served as the only working airport, hotel and hospital for the area.  Injured civilians were continuously being brought onboard…one man with a knife sticking out of his chest.  Flight Ops were being conducted 24 hours a day.  We were housing DoD staff, aid organizations and basically anyone else you could think of.  I was given the opportunity to meet Vice President Dick Cheney and his family.  President Bush came a few times and stayed aboard.  I did have the option of meeting him or taking a helicopter ride of the city…so I took the helo ride .

In the time we were stationed in Louisiana, I helped restore a church and promenade area and was able to provide meals and relief to workers who had come from all around the world to do their part.  It was the longest month of my life, but the most rewarding.  I would do it again in a second.

Check out my Hurricane Katrina Relief gallery!

Beginning of a New Era…Again

To the surprise of many, and dismay of a few, I decided to go back into the U.S. Navy.  It is not a decision that I came to lightly, or without many hours of thought and consideration.  And the desire started slowly…just a small fire lit after I had been out for about a year.  That fire grew so rapidly, that I have dedicated the last nine months of my life to getting back in.  Now I’ve finally done it.

A lot of people didn’t understand at first.  Perhaps they still don’t.  It took some time as a civilian to realize what a part of me the military had really become.  Although I was happy to be out at the time,  I was constantly thinking about the Navy and talking about it.  I would dream about it even.  I also began to notice that I couldn’t connect to people like I used to.  Don’t get me wrong, I have met and am friends with many wonderful people…but something is missing.  That bond that I used to have with other military members.  That we were experiencing and fighting for the same things.  I missed being myself and knowing that they would never judge me and would keep me safe.  They would hug me and hold me without knowing why, but in complete comfort.

And then the stir-craziness began.  Sitting in my cubicle knowing that I would be there the day after, and the day after that, and the day after that would kill me.  My job has been great and I have worked with wonderful people, yet I felt I was dying on the inside.  This is not the kind of life that I needed.  Where is the “X” factor?  The crisis that might happen where I might be called to leave at any second.  Maybe I’m the kind of person who needs a cause.  One thing I do know is that I need to help people.  I help people, but I don’t feel like I’ve had that opportunity in a long time.  That’s going to change shortly.

There are a couple people who understand where I’m coming from though.  My Navy friends who got out around the same time I did, and several who have gotten out since.  Because they are going through the same thing and I hope that they follow the paths that will make them happy with their lives.

Being a civilian just isn’t enough.  I am military and want to feel my purpose again.